Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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