i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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