we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize
