Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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