I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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