But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
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So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
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I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Randomize