So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Randomize
