Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
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