??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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