I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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