Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
