shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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