I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
she looked like the before picture.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
