Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
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Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
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Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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