Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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