We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Randomize
