Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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