Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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