Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
