hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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