Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Randomize
