When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
