do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Randomize
