You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Randomize
