have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
