People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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