batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
