if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
