so explain again why im purple
no
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
