Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
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