awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
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