my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
