i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
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