I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
