I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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