OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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