Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
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