if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
