people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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