I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Randomize
