belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Randomize
