3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
