No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize
