I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
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