I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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