I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I believe in your delicious
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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