I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
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