ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
