My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
