guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
