Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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